Wednesday, November 14, 2007

The Housebroken Husband

I have high expectations of my mate.

I expect that he never even look at another woman lustfully (but God himself decreed this so it must be possible -- St. Matthew 5:27; at least with His help).

I expect him to provide a living within his abilities: food, clothes, shelter, warmth and transportation.

I expect him to play with our babies happily & to help out with their needs (ie: bathing, diaper changes, nighttime rocking).

I expect him to be kind and loving to me & to make me feel safe just by being around.

And he does. He does all these things so seamlessly that sometimes I forget they take effort. Every once in a while I imagine my life without these pillars he provides and I shudder at the desolation.

So this is why I've chosen to ignore the fact that he's about as housebroken as a puppy dog. His continuous ability to live in his own filth amazes me. Sometime after we had kids I accepted this fact. I don't like it. I never will. But I choose to accept it.

But what does this acceptance look like? It means picking up his socks & washing them & putting them away (happily). It means cooking, cleaning & loading & unloading the dishwasher every single day. I don't get thanked often enough (who does?) but then again I don't do cartwheels every time his paycheck arrives either.

Does he take me for granted? Definitely. But don't I do the same in turn. Should we remind one another at times of our labors? Sure. When done in true charity, it never hurts.

But at the end of the day, I'm a lot happier expecting the only domestic help from my spouse in the form of a flushed toilet (the seat down is always nice as well). He complies every time and I am so proud.


stmelber said...

Very cute. I really enjoyed it. Definately not preachy but thanks for the disclaimer anyway.

stmelber said...

PS-Don't try rubbing Pete's nose in his messes (as one might do with a puppy). It does not help the situation.

Lesson learned.

tiffani said...

Hey Sarah,

Very interesting piece. I am the slob in my house, so Lee would probably embrace your ideas easier. He does all the laundry and washes things where we live.

You totally triggered something inside my Catholic brain in this post, though. It contributed to the thoughts on my own blog. Give your thoughts on it, if you have time.

Abigail said...

Since John wasn't a bulging-muscles-kind-of-guy, I expected something different than normal. Nope.

He's funny, though, because he'll pile his pocket papers in identical mountains, fold his dirty socks neatly on the floor, put garbage in the mixing bowl, and put empty beer cans in the dish rack. I guess he makes a half-hearted attempt to be tidy.

I like this post.