Vegetarians Are Annoying

Vegetarians are annoying. They really should go back to where they came from.

Doesn't everyone agree? I mean I associate the kooks (especially the ones who still eat fish! fish is meat!) with civil war reinactors and white woman who do karate in the "you're kidding" category.

So why the rant? I hope it doesn't feel like a rant as I mean them no harm and I'm really not even mad. I mean I would never purposely run over a herbivore with my car or shopping cart but at the same time I'm not having one over for dinner any time soon. But still, why the rant? ...

One too many a person as of late has asked me if I shop at the local organic farm; they ask me in a way like they know I'm going to say "yes" and then they'll say "me too" and then we'll have this really lame thing in common. How cool. One lady even said I look like I hang out there. And recently my hair dresser flat out asked me if I eat meat (she said, "cause you look like you don't"). Pray tell, what do meat eaters look like?

Yes, I eat meat and no I don't hang out at organic farms. I like things packaged, preserved and loaded with lots of salt and dead animals. I also like smoking and drinking and I don't even recycle (bonus info).

I'm really not mad about the fact that I strike people as a granola stomping type, I guess. I mean I actually take it as a compliment when I really think about it. When I get the comments I always think I must emit a bottled water type of savior fare -- that or I look oddly thin and wacky in my dark-rimmed glasses (probably the latter).

Whatever the case, let it be known that I'm definitely not a vegetarian. I know I pretended to be in college for like 6 months but I secretly ate chicken the whole time (see, vegetarians are annoying).